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To get started say your name

Name: So I just talk like I normally would, and the words just appear on the— Hey, it’s doing it now! 
Everything I say is showing up on the screen. Cool. 

Age: Anyway, my name is Elliot. You may know me as Mirage. 

Location: Yes. The Mirage. Legend. Gorgeous. Charming. Champion. I’m 30 . . . wait, 29 . . . okay, I’m 30, and . . . oh, this is for location? Got it. 

About me: Solace City

Seeking: Eh, I’ll fix it later. Seeking women age 25 to . . . I don’t know . . . 25 to ‘alive’? And definitely just women, and not like . . . you know. . . pumpkins. . . never been attracted to pumpkins.
Definitely wasn’t attracted to a pumpkin that night on Dionysus when I ate those Khionan mushrooms. Wait, did I say that out loud?

What I’m Looking For:
Hey gerl . . . and that’s with an “e”, for excellent. Lingo! I’m hip with the kids. Anyway, don’t be shy. Say hi. Plenty of me to go around. (Literally.) And I know you don’t want to be bamboozled, so here’s the deal: I don’t want to settle down. But neither do you. You want to go out, have a few beers, not deal with a bunch of obnoxious friends, and just throw caution to the wind with no reperkus—repra—reppre—no bad stuff. And I’m telling you: I’m your guy! I go out! I go all out! Want beer? I own a bar! I have beer! And don’t worry about my friends, because most of them have gone south. Like . . . six-feet-under-south. Whatever. Life happens. Wow. That got dark. 

Anyhoo, besides the bar, my side job is actually my passion. And I’m considered “legendary” when it comes to my passion. (Get it?) When I'm not doing that, I'm murdering pork chops and flirting with some delicious drinks. I don’t actually murder pork chops, that’s just weird . . . unless you’re into that kinda thing. 

Anyway, take a chance on me! And when it’s over, the ball’s in your court. You can go your way. I’ll go mine. No harm, no foul. Or maybe you’ll like me. We’ll get a dog. Like a golden retriever. Or a wiener dog. Wiener dogs are great. Buy a ranch outside Solace City. Raise a couple rugrats. You can follow your dreams. I’ll be a stay-at-home dad. Not that I want to settle down. I don’t. Do I . . .? I don’t know . . . maybe? Well, no regrets so far. Except that night with the Khionian mushrooms. But we don’t talk about that. Maybe I should delete that part before I post this. Excuse me? Dating service MRVN? How do I go back and change something? Could you imagine if that pumpkin story got out? Yikes. So if I want to enter changes, I just hit this green ENTER button like


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<b>Meet Mirage</b>

Meet Mirage

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