Party Like A Pro!

The Backpage… with Darren Cross

I’ve played a lot of 2010 FIFA World Cup online since the game came out months ago, like I’m sure you all have too, and most of the time it’s a lot of fun. Apart from when I’ve been absolutely taken apart or, worse, narrowly beaten by a player who’s bagged a lucky goal in the last minute then forced me to watch all three replays and his robot celebration. Ouch.

Having to watch three replays of a poor goal is torture and pretty bad manners in my book. Unless you’re playing against a good mate or someone you know, surely one replay is enough and only then if the goal is really good? Going for all three, including the super slow-mo, is just cruel, but even that isn’t as annoying to me as having to watch people do the same old celebrations time and time again (in case you hadn’t already worked this out – I concede a lot of goals)!

This is absolutely guaranteed to make me angry, which is absolutely guaranteed to make me lose, which is absolutely guaranteed to make me angry etc etc.

So, in an effort to make things more entertaining for me the next time you stick one on the back of my net, I’ve put together a list of the ten celebrations I don’t mind watching. I’ll even tell you how to do them and give you a handy YouTube link for each so you can see which players do them for real.

All you have to do is promise no more robot dances or brick falls.

Deal?

Good, here goes…

The Cantona
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Left trigger & hold the right stick up
Cantona is one of my all-time favourite players, and the goal that preceded this celebration is one of his best.

The Golfer
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Left bumper, then flick right stick to the right and hold left
Back when Bellamy was a Liverpool player, a story came out in the press that he’d hit team-mate John Arne Riise with a golf club. The striker scored in his next game and celebrated like this. Classic.

The Denilson
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Left bumper & hold right stick left
Arsenal midfielder Denilson did this weird head-shake dance after scoring against Everton at Goodison. Watching this one in-game always makes me laugh. Actually, not always. There was one time when I lost 7-0 and had to watch this after every goal. I wasn’t laughing then.

The Thumb Sucker
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Just hold X
Loads of players have celebrated like this over the years, but I think Robinho is the most high-profile of them all. The internet says he does this for his son, so it must be true.

The Violinist
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Right trigger & B
I’ve never seen anyone do this online, which is weird as it’s easy to do and also pretty funny. Italy striker Alberto Gilardino started it.

The Robbie Keane
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Left trigger & hold right stick right
I’ve seen this called all sorts of things on YouTube and fan sites, but few seem to realise it’s actually Robbie Keane’s trademark celebration.

The Aghahowa
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: L1 and right stick flick left then hold right
Back in 2007, Wigan signed a striker who had become known for his elaborate multiple backflip celebration. The fans packed in to see him do this in his first game, but Aghahowa couldn’t score and was still goalless 20 games later. Then Wigan let him go for free. Nice.

Shhhhh
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Hold right stick left
This is another celebration that lots of players have done, but it’s definitely become a trademark for Arsenal pocket rocket Andrey Arshavin. I love that he even does it when running towards his own fans!

Toni’s Ear Twist
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Hold Y
It’s been a while since I’ve seen Luca Toni score a goal, but he used to once-upon-a-time and this was how he liked to celebrate.

The Moonwalk
WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE
DO IT: Left trigger & hold right stick up
Although I like the celebration in game, I just couldn’t think who had done this in real life. Then I remembered seeing Bas Savage on Soccer AM. Legend.

My GamerTag is DazCross – remember the deal okay?

See you next week.

Darren